Clarets Mad Tw*t of the Week 2002/03 – Week 18

It’s not sure where he will be playing his football next season, he has constantly refused to sign a new deal at Elland Road and when he thought he had got away, to Liverpool, he was very publicly snubbed by Gerard Houllier who challenged his commitment.

One place he won’t be going though is Malaga, I think he is the last person on earth who would welcome him after his antics last week as Leeds went out of the UEFA Cup. It was during this game that Bowyer thought fit to stamp on the head of Malaga defender Gerardo.

After the game his manager Barry Boy Venables tried manfully to defend his midfielder claiming that Gerardo had play acted but he was made to look pretty stupid when Bowyer later admitted it.

Venables then said, “He’s admitted himself that he’s got to take whatever comes at him”, as he realised that his midfielder was going to be in some trouble. With Leeds out of the competition it will be some time before Bowyer has to serve any suspension and by that time he will probably no longer be at Leeds.

The only thing we can hope for is that UEFA hit him hard with a long, long suspension from European football.

Victoria Park - home of runners up Hartlepool United

We go into the 3rd Division for second place this week and to the club currently top of that league. This week Hartlepool United have behaved disgracefully in demanding money from two other clubs in the division to move a fixture.

Hartlepool are due to play Scunthorpe this weekend and at Hartlepool’s request the fixture was moved to Friday evening and not only that, at their request Carlisle moved the kick off time for their New Year’s Day fixture.

Then the FA Cup 2nd round replay between Carlisle and Scunthorpe was switched to last night for showing on Sky television, a major boost for both clubs with each receiving £100,000.

This though meant switching back Scunthorpe’s league game with Hartlepool to the Saturday, the original date. But Hartlepool demanded payment from both Scunthorpe and Carlisle, otherwise they were not prepared to do it.

So the two clubs both had to agree to pay Hartlepool £25,000 each otherwise the money from Sky would go begging.

This is pretty much as low as a club could stoop and certainly the Carlisle had something to say about it.

Hartlepool currently lead the division but there will be many now hoping that they start to slide down the league.

Third place - the Flood Warden Andy Hall

Third place this week is an old favourite this season, referee Andy Hall. Bookings after six seconds and playing in floods has ensured that the flood warden has been a regular. This time it is because he decided to go card crazy.

When Hall is in charge it is not uncommon to see six, seven or even eight yellow cards, this most ridiculous of officials is averaging over five yellow cards a game and a red card every two games but at Stoke he broke all his records by waving his yellow card no fewer than thirteen times. Two of those were second yellows to Stoke players Wayne Thomas and Brynjar Gunnarsson.

His performance was considered so ridiculous that the two managers, Tony Pulis and Gary McAllister, chose to issue a joint statement condemning Hall’s performance. It is unlikely that anything will be done though, Hall is still refereeing despite a string of dreadful performances over the past few years.

That’s it for this week but don’t forget you have until next Thursday to send us your NOMINATIONS for next week. All will be revealed next Friday.

The winners so far:

Week 1 – Roy Keane (Manchester United)
Week 2 – Jeff Winter (Referee)
Week 3 – Football League’s Football Disciplinary Commission
Week 4 – Alex Ferguson (Manchester United manager)
Week 5 – Luton Town supporters
Week 6 – Barry Knight (Referee)
Week 7 – Burnley FC Showboaters
Week 8 – Tony Livesey (Editor Sunday Sport)
Week 9 – The Directors and Owners of Franchise FC
Week 10 – David Sheepshanks (Ipswich Town Chairman)
Week 11 – David Davies (Football Association)
Week 12 – George Boeteng (Middlesbrough)
Week 13 – Andy Hall (Referee)
Week 14 – Craig Hignett (Coventry City Loan Player)
Week 15 – Garry Flitcroft (Blackburn Rovers)
Week 16 – Craig Bellamy & Alan Shearer (Newcastle United)
Week 17 – Peter Kenyon (Manchester United Chief Executive)
Week 18 – Lee Bowyer (Leeds United)