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Come on, admit it, how many returned home and after kicking the dog - so to speak, checked the league tables, concentrating on the results of Sheff Wed, Derby, Stoke, Walsall and Grimsby? If you did not, why not, because after this insipid, putrid display you should. On this form Clarets (from now on George IV) will finish the season remaining on the current forty nine points and will almost certainly break the hundred goals against column, if the defending, using the term in its loosest form, continues as against Watford (from now on (The Black Bull).
Black Bull remember, were not top of the table material, in fact were bottom of the form league and were a poor side, themselves without a league win in nine. April 3rd 2003, mark it in your diary, the first date in two millennia, since a Burnley first team last conceded seven league goals in a so called professional league game.
Right abacus' at the ready, we'll not dwell too long on the game, other than to say that with Gareth Taylor and Matty O'Neill making his debut, these were two rays of sunshine as the storm clouds gathered on a desperately poor performance, for which the remaining players and first team management should be thoroughly ashamed.
Surely the absences of Diallo and Little for reasons of injury and strategic planning respectively, cannot have such an impact on the team? Other than goals, of which there were only nine in a ridiculous first half of rush back goalkeeping standards, there was precious little quality, neither defence bothering to demonstrate professional qualities.
Black Bull took the lead after only ten minutes, Ardley's corner given free passage by the George IV defence to the forehead of Brown, who had little difficulty finding the net in their first foray up field. Five minutes later and the George IV were level, Blake's jinking run ending in a cross to the far post for Taylor to catch a therm as he soared above the statuesque defenders of the Black Bull.
Before we'd got to the chorus of Tom Hark, Black Bull regained their lead, with comic goalkeeping coming in to play, though it would not be the last on the day. Mahon's innocuous ball into the area was not recognised as a threat by the so called defenders and completely misjudged by Beresford, allowing Hyde to sweep the ball into an empty net for 1-2 and its only quarter past three.
Ten minutes on and Branch's toe poke was inches wide of the post, a pity it was his own goal he was aiming at and a corner was conceded. Three one it was from the corner as Cox rose unmarked to put the Black Bull yet further in front as the home defence stood silent and just looked at one another.
Before the expletives had died down, Davis' horror of a pass, went straight to Chopra, who from the half-way line, simply had a clear run at goal, before a deft lob over an already embarrassed Beresford left the home keeper to perform an all too familiar sight, that of picking the ball out of his unguarded net for 1-4.
With chants of F*** off Teasdale (I jest not), accusations of many other things, but mainly idleness and dubious parentage being directed pitch wards, emanating from this the Family Stand, feelings you could say were running a little high. With sarcastic applause following Marlon's next touch of the ball and chants for Glen Little, there was certainly a wide range of feeling around the home stands. There were even somewhat sarcastic cries of "shoot" directed at a Black Bull player still in his own half at the time!
As for some of us, we'd settle for a draw, there was still over an hour to play after all. It was 2-4 on thirty five minutes, Davis tapping home from all of a yard after a great header down from Taylor, once again confirmed that Black Bull themselves left their defenders on the team bus.
Within three minutes and the howls of derision temporarily turned into a mood of genuine cheer, the head of Taylor seeing the George IV back into the game for 3-4, albeit briefly, this time his powerful close range header putting the ball into the net along with the keeper and his marking defender just for good measure.
Once again the shock of attackers (well one at least) fulfilling their contractual obligations proved too much for the George IV defence and with Marlon playing in hands free mode Chopra gained his second, this time tapping home into the empty net after a simple ball in to the box left George IV defenders in a state of disarray.
There was still time for 4-5 before the break, Taylor's superb chest control and shot on the half volley leaving Chamberlain stranded in the only moment approaching professional football standards in an otherwise despicable first half.
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So the half time team talks in and around the stands were of 8-8, 7-6 in the many head shaking conversations taking place as fans nominated their worst player on the day awards.
Apparently, Grant had been on the pitch in the first half, but he would not partake in the second, Arthur coming on for the midfield dynamo as Stan shuffled the pack, pushing Branch into a more forward role.
George IV certainly began the brighter and had the better of the second half, territorially speaking, a pity then that the defending continued at the low standards of the first half. Arthur forced a good save out of Chamberlain and Taylor had a header cleared from the line, but on the hour mark Black Bull gained a sixth goal.
Marlon went for walkies big style, allowing Smith to cut the ball across the eighteen yard line from where Chopra claimed his hat trick, smartly sweeping home into, yes you've guessed it, an empty and completely unguarded net. Quite what Marlon's embarrassing conversation with the linesman was all about is anyone's guess - a new contract perhaps?
Ian Moore, posing as a striker, could do little more than head over, when unmarked from eight yards from West's neat cross. McGregor then committed the next howler and he could be very thankful to Marlon who saved with his feet as Chopra once gain had the freedom of Turf Moor.
The second half's moment of quality came as Cox's neat first time shot was well held by Marlon atoning rather late in the day for his errors before McGregor was replaced by debutant young lad O'Neill, who had twenty minutes to help his senior colleagues redeem themselves.
His was a bright note on an otherwise dull day. Quite what Stan was thinking of, playing a confident wide man, who plays his football on the floor and also has a long throw in his armoury. I mean a good winger, what use is one of those?
It was O'Neill, who without any support, turned his pursuers and put over a neat cross for that man Taylor to head and beat Chamberlain late on, but his header crashed against the angle, Briscoe not surprisingly fluffed the rebound and Moore found the top corner, but of the stand and not the net from all of ten yards.
Sub Norville, not a green duck, but a lively young striker, came on with the Black Bull playing time out. A green duck could have set up the embarrassing seventh, West was AWOL along with his co-defenders and the young striker Norville merely had to advance towards goal and set up Chopra who had no problems claiming the match ball as his fourth goal crashed past a helpless Beresford. That was most definitely that, the whit on our row explaining at high decibel levels to all who were interested, the uncomfortable orifice in which the Club can place his next season ticket.
Att:- 13,215, or 10,208 in bank manager terms.
Star Gazer
Marlon had this one in the bag by half time, but second half saves helped him avoid the final award of the tag. The winner is Steve Davis. Since returning from injury his reappearance does not offer anywhere near the same player as I have in my memory. At fault for at least three of the goals, his influence on the game has currently disappeared.
Glass Half Empty
George IV now have the worst home defensive record in the Division and on six occasions this season, have conceded four goals or more. Enough said.
Star Geezer
Without shadow of a doubt Gareth Taylor. Quite where this motley crew would be without his ability to remain focused when all around are simply pathetic is anyone's guess. Scores three goals and still can't take the match ball home with him, what a day.
Glass Half Full
Kept it to seven.